Stop ... Homer Time!

Just looked over this weeks matchups this week and 5dimes Sportsbook has Chicago at -1(115). For those of you who don't know what that means, it means fricking GAME OF THE YEAR. I'm taking out a second mortgage to play this. You think Seneca Wallace is going to be able to NOT fuck himself in this game? They're missing their left tackle and probably Walter Jones as well and you got a Bear team off a win over the Super Bowl Champs. Cutler is starting to spread the ball, wide receivers and tight ends alike are stepping up, and the damn defense is rallying without Brian Urlacher. On top of that Seattle's lone win this season came over the hapless Rams when they were fully healthy.

Of all the games on the board, I would put down Cedric Benson's stash (or the street value equivalent) on the Bears this week.

Neckbeard calls Cuntler

NB: Jay? What's going on you fuck suck! It's me, Capt. fucking comeback neckbeard motherfucker!!!
JC: Hey Kyle (sulking) ... Stuff sucks. You see the game?
NB: Oh did I? I kept rubbig my taint on the fucking tv! I used to ass-rape those packer fags, guess you don't have the gun I got. Did you see my td to win it?
JC: Yeah that was really good. Stokley really is a good receiver.
NB: Stokley!? Are you shiatting me? That was capt. neckbeard ... I fucking threw that 25 yard bomb man, I've never seen a pass so pretty! Fucking just like I drew it up ... Let it hang in the air for a good 25-30 seconds and get tipped to the white guy. FUCKING BRILLIANT!!!
JC: Well good call Kyle. Way to go. (cuts himself)
NB: You're damn right. That's the way I roll ... The neckbeard knows how the fuck to win a game. Lull them to sleep with the 5 yared passes and then BOOOMMMM MOTHERFUCKERS here's a 25 yarder! You didn't expect that did ya biatches!!! I can float it like a fucking A & W!!! Ain't nobody but my receivers are expecting the 25 yard hot air balloon!!! (swigs half a bottle of Jack, tongue kisses solid 5 of 10 scale skank)
JC: (takes big scoop of Ben and Jerry's Hubby Hubby)
NB: So ... you're just gonna sit there and eat ice cream and sulk aren't ya?
JC: (swallows hard) no.
NB: Bullshit. C'mon Jay you gotta get with the Neckbeard philosophy. You know what that is?
JC: Um ... drink lots of Jack Daniels and fuck nothing but skanks?
NB: SEE! YOU SEE MOTHERFUCKER!! You WERE listening! Buck up sulker and put down the Ben and Jerry's. Go out fuck a skank. Drink some jack and remember ...
JC: Yeah, yeah I know. Rex Grossman's a cock fuck.
NB: HAHA, you're my boy Jay (chugs rest of Jack, flashes cock to three-toothed 40-year old at end of bar) Talk to ya next week sulk boy!!

Who ya got on Gameday? - Part 3

With the signing of Rod Hood and some waffling due to Hunter Hillenmeyer, here is my latest stab at the final 53. Notice, Garret Wolfe is gone replaced by Rashied Davis and Hillenmeyer replaces Kevin Malast:

Offense - 25

Quarterbacks(2)
J. Cutler
C. Hanie

Running Backs(3)
M. Forte
K. Jones
A. Peterson

Fullbacks(1)
J. McKie

Wide Receivers(7)
D. Hester (returner)
E. Bennett
Iglesias
Knox
Aromashodu
Rideau
R. Davis

Tight Ends(3)
G. Olsen
D. Clark
K. Davis

Tackles(4)
C. Williams
O. Pace
Shaffer
Balogh

Guards(4)
R. Garza
J. Beekman (can play center)
Omiyale (can play tackle)
Buening

Center(1)
O. Kreutz

Defense - 25

Defensive Ends(5)
A. Ogunleye
A. Brown
M. Anderson
I. Idonije (can play DT)
Melton

Defensive Tackles(4)
T. Harris
A. Adams
J. Gilbert
M. Harrison

Linebackers(7)
B. Urlacher
L. Briggs
P. Tinoisanamo
J. Williams
N. Roach
D. McClover
H. Hillenmeyer

Cornerbacks(5)
C. Tillman
N. Vasher
Z. Bowman
C. Graham (can play safety)
R. Hood

Safeties(4)
C. Steltz
K. Payne
A. Alfalava
D. Manning (can play nickel)

Special Teams - 3

Long Snapper(1)
P. Mannelly

Kicker(1)
R. Gould

Punter(1)
B. Maynard